 | Moved | Nov 14, '07 1:54 PM for everyone |
My blogspot has moved. Do update your links. http://madeoutofmiracles.blogspot.com There is the everything blog. Here is the thinking blog. Though I kind of might just streamline to blogspot (tagboard function wins). Anyway update update your links everywhere! Thanks!  | Lights | Nov 7, '07 4:54 PM for everyone |
Today during cell group, really had the presence of God. I saw a stone staircase, the type that winds up a tower for people to climb when inside castles. So I was on a castle's stone staircase. It was dark, lighted only by single wall torches with the wood parts in conical glass holders, mounted at an angle on the wall. So the flames were coming out of the top of the glass lights. Except they were upside down cones. At least, everything seemed like a typical castle staircase interior setting. Then I looked closer, and I saw there was a cross on each cone. And every cross was one of the crucification of Jesus. I got a mild shock, then I realised what it was trying to tell me. The pathway may be dark and long, but God is lighting up the path and guiding me every step of the way. Gosh, haven't logged in here for a while. Guess I'll post before I catch up. In the end, I realise, many thing things don't matter. Fame, glory, fun, etc... Dear God: Take it all away. Because it all comes crashing down, when I realise none of it matters. I'm sorry I wasn't there when someone needed me. When my friend was hurting, there I was, caught up with work. God, I don't understand sometimes. To do your work, I need to sacrifice. I sacrificed so much, and I thought I was fine. Then, I realise. What is the true meaning of sacrifice. Sacrifice is...something that is of great value of you, that you give up, and it hurts to give it up. My friend, her aunt passed away about a week ago. And I wasn't there. I didn't know. I could have known, if I merely went online. I could have been there. But I wasn't. So God, teach me somemore, the meaning of sacrifice... I'm not making much sense here. All I know, is that what God wants me to know is not to get too caught up with the results and products of success in achieving His works for HIm. Remember your purpose in doing things - For the glory of God. I'm too late to be there where I should have been, if I were to be there for my friend. But there's some comfort in knowing it was because I was where God wanted me to be, somewhere else doing something He wanted. Sacrifice - A choice of what you want to give up in order to pursue the other. Usually involves pain, either choice.  | Boring | Aug 10, '07 2:36 PM for everyone |
Ok, think this is working properly again. Two days ago, tremors swayed the house. Blah blah blah. National Day was boring. I've been craving bubble tea for so long but haven't had the chance to drink it. It's nothing to do with the shops being so near my house, it's I don't really have an occasion to (no outing or such). With all my friends studying for exams, I feel...lonely. I also feel a little bored, though I can entertain myself, it just gets so quiet sometimes. Lonely + Bored = Too much time to think... EDIT: Due to the stupid formatting problems that this thing is causing to my entry, I'm not going to post my original planned entry. Went for deliverance this week, I don't exactly feel like I'm floating around or anything, but I just know I'm squeaky-clean inside now. Things that are clean must be maintained, keep cleaning and touch-up constantly.. Well, multiplication was this week too. I'm now in Sarina's cell, E247. I feel..firstly, with deliverance, I've been given a clean slate to start on. That all the dusty cobwebs, the unwanted parts, they've been cleared out so that I can move on in life. Though this is the second time I've went for deliverance, I guess got different things to clear out that I didn't all get last time. A house will still get dirt somewhere in corners you can't reach no matter how hard you try and mop it. Now, with my new cell, it's like I've just moved into a new house. I'm not close to anyone in particular in this cell, I have to build relationships and bonds with everyone. Time to learn from these new people, wonder what can I offer to them. I'm the youngest in this cell, which is categorised as Young Adult Cell. I'm the treasurer, because I have a "treasurer face" (bah, Rina didn't know but I was a treasurer in CCA before). I find its kind of a minor upgrade from birthday coordinator, or at least, time to move on from being birthday coordinator! @_@ And the random thing of today is that Ivan (member, not Rina's husband) had his shoes stolen when we were having cell group. Don't know which wuliao crazy pest wants to steal people's shoes. As if you can resell them or anything. As Rina is going on maternity leave soon (baby Asher going to be due mid August), we're going to temporarily combine with Ivan's (Rina's husband) cell. It's like 'renovation' period to me, as we try to settle down into a workable routine. As for school, I finished WFM, have no idea if its good, don't really care already, the appendices are so long I have like 20 pages of appendices when my report is only a few pages. CIBM report keeps looking too short to me, I feel a little worried about it, yet at the same time I just want to get it over and done with. But is just a sentence or two for some subheadings sufficient?? And then there's SW, which I must grip myself and make myself finish it all at one go in one night. Then after that is ICMT roleplay, and then finally ICM presentation on 13 August. THEN I'M FREEEEEEE. Two more weeks! And then somehow, I just knew. Incredible revelations on a wide array of topics. Excuse the vagueness; I'm hungry and there's too much to say that words sometimes won't do, but that's when all the rest comes in. I've still got a lifetime left for everyone to stay tuned and watch my life story unfold. DOUGHNUT on my dining table soon to be in my tummy~ And I want to go to the Munchy Donut Cafe in Katong during my hols. Anyone? Always reminding myself, constantly.. Everything will be alright. I can do all things. Even when it seems so hard, so difficult to keep up. All the struggles, overcoming every obstacle, every hardship, every physical weakness. Even when my eyes keep wanting to shut, when my flesh fights against the world in more ways than one. Even when the devil puts weird imagery in my mind, of me being dead? How extremely odd. I don't have any inclination towards dying, yet all these thoughts keep being put into my mind. It's ok. The devil can push whatever he wants at me. Undesirable lifestyles, things I've left behind, worlds and ways I've thrown back, that come upon my face one after the other once again and again, and even new things that I've not yet encountered. Sheesh. I have God, and that is enough. Always enough, though things may try and make me think otherwise. I won't give up on God so easily. Cos He never gave up on me, even when I never deserved it. Everyday, keep on fighting. Fight against what isn't, and fight for what is. I'm glad. MIKE CONNELL next week!!!!! WHOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! And after that, PHIL PRINGLE and DON MOEN and AR BERNARD. August is like going to be my favourite month I think. Sometimes I go on a multiply phase. Sometimes I go on a blogspot phase. Sometimes I go on a roll and update all my blogs like woah. And that's the phase I'm in at the moment. Cool ain't it. I don't cross post, at most I rewrite about what I want to talk about. Or just leave different things in different blogs. Different places, different purposes. And there I go rambling again when what I really meant to say was my legs are aching, I'm eagerly awaiting my DVD rom to be returned to my CPU so that I can watch my precious "FIVE IN BLACK" DVD. It's unopened and flashing all it's pretty shiny newness at me. Don't trust the laptop cos it's new and a little buggy, so I'll scream if it hangs on me halfway and damages my discs. Er, that's not why my legs are aching. Did a lot of walking today. Went to a birthday. Then went to a wake. An irony in a day? :/ Everything is fine..I think.. These days quite cheerful, no idea why. Instead of PMS, was like hyperly high and cheerful. Crazy..lol.. Maybe drink too much Heaven & Earth green tea. Nah. Happy then happy, good, God-given. Now all the blessings pour in, but don't be complacent or ungrateful. Every day is good, loving it, not say life's easier, just the same, busier soon, or even now, yet, happy. Glad. Yet. Now that I'm recovered from sickness, time to rebuild my stamina. Spiritual life must maintain and grow. That issue plagues me again, of which ministry to join, confusion but oh well. I'll figure it out. Soon. Thanks but I can make my decisions myself (with God, and MJ's suggestions, but that's pending still, hard to get him on the phone). I like cheesecake. And creampuffs. Think I'm putting on weight. All the fattening food, and great food I've been so blessed to be able to eat, right after I recovered. Tomorrow and Tuesday again, food again. YAY. Now don't really have any photos cos all taken by others, but guess you all are fine with that. After all, main purpose of this blog is for the words, right? At least here. :) One month of jumbled up thoughts, putting them down in words, this is my jumbled up thoughts place. Cool ain't it. Does anyone have the song "Puppet" by Milk? Kind of catchy tune. No matter what. God is here with me. Through all things. No matter what. Hmm should I go eat somemore cheesecake right now..
This is my 100th post here. A milestone? So what do I have to conclude on this occasion?
God's testing me, and I have no idea why or what for.
Nobody said it would be easy
Nobody said it would be this hard
I'm going back to the start
Horribly struck down, well, could be worse, so right now..at a loss. A lot of things.
I sound more optimistic and positive here than I do in real life. In reality, I've already broke down.
I can't go back, yet I'm not moving forward either.
(Please don't leave any comments.)
 | Easter | Apr 10, '07 3:19 PM for everyone |
Easter overall was good. Watched 4/5 of the services.
POS is ok, though think maybe there's lots more we can achieve. Let's breakthrough again and again!
Somehow I've been eating a lot of ice cream these days at home. :/ Feeling fatter. Nooooooo.
Prayer is powerful. Want to make it even stronger and more.
God has really been blessing me.
I got reunited with my primary school friend through Friendster.
Goodness, it has been almost ten years or something since we last saw
each other.
I got a new handphone yesterday! It has many more features than my old
phone, and though I'm not really used to it nor utilise the features so
much as of yet, I believe upgrading my phone is a way of upgrading the
way I live! Haha. Expand your world, give yourself room to do more
things, then accomplish them well!
I'll be changing phone plan soon too, in mid-April, I'll finally have
free incoming. FINALLY!! Thank God, all of these things weren't due to
occur till August this year.
Growing spiritually, but I've got a drive to do more, get more, guess
desire is good but shouldn't be kanchiong either, pace everything out,
I'll get to the next stages in due time, so just have to concentrate on
doing my current things well and be PROGRESSIVE.
Holy Spirit has really been protecting me. We had POS training today,
and while attempting one of the newly-learnt stunts, I fell over and
fortunately, someone caught me by the waist so that my head was
hovering maybe 20 to 30cm above the floor. I may be safe now, but it
does shock you how important safety is, and how easily it could have
been a very bad accident.
Been on the go a lot these days, pray that I won't be tired out but
instead have God helping me to keep on doing everything well.
 | Jobs | Mar 17, '07 2:11 PM for everyone |
Hi everyone, my good friend just lost her job. If anyone got any job
lobang, please do let me know. She would like something in childcare,
or admin might be ok too. She has admin experience, highest
qualifications is private diploma I think...For more details do contact
me..
Please do help if you can, thanks!
I'm meeting up with her tomorrow to cheer her up, hope she will manage to feel better and find a better job soon.
Nothing is impossible, if you put your trust in God.
It's been a while since I've updated this blog. Been slacking at home,
yet at the same time have things to do, events that keep my time
occupied. But when there isn't anything, I should be glad that I have
some time to rest right? Being busy all the time is no good. Being too
free is no good too. As long as I can balance the two, and feel happy,
then it should be fine.
The theme for this year is time management for me! Balancing all my
responsibilities. School and church activities are all going to be
demanding soon, just hope and trust God that I can handle them all,
"with a smile on my face in everything that I'm doing", to quote Sarina.
A lot of opportunities are opening up for me, even if the desired
result doesn't occur from them, at least I would have learnt something
through the experience of trying.
Sometimes, it can be stressful, trying and failing again and again.
Well, I just have to remind myself there will come a time when I try
and will be successful. Patience, perseverance, learning...
I'm glad to be blessed with many wonderful friends and family always.
Feeling quite happy these days, I didn't expect CNY to be so good. I
expected to be quite bored during this CNY. It's quite funny how my dad
and I were opening almost all the goodies that were still sealed and
ate like pigs (pig year? haha) while watching CNY shows today.
Bengawan Solo has great cashew cookies, by the way. :D
Tomorrow, I've got another day of visiting, this time to friends houses.
I just hope my brother takes enough rest, balancing work and home. Think it's pretty hectic at the moment, being CNY period.
Today is CNY eve, in the afternoon my sister and her husband came over
for lunch and we had our yu sheng. Then another yu sheng again for
dinner with my father's side relatives (we've got quite a small number
on my father's side).
Tomorrow, we'll be having yet another yu sheng with my mum's side relatives!
I like yu sheng. Haha. Too bad, only once a year is it available.
It's kind of quiet this CNY. I'm actually kind of bored today, nothing
much to do. Oh well. Enjoy time to just relax. But since I'm on
holiday, I already have a lot of time to do that.
...never mind, I shall just go eat eat eat all the CNY goodies! Hahahaha.
Hope everyone is having a good CNY this year.
I'm really blessed by Pst Derek's message today, about building healthy
relationships. We have to deal with the 4 negative attitudes which
destroy relationships, and do the things that will help to build
relationships instead. Wow!
God is good all the time. I'm more and more convinced of that everyday.
Trust and obey, there's no other way. To be happy in Jesus, you've got
to trust and obey! :)
Thank God that He's with me always at all times.
Hmm. I can't control a lot of things. But I can continue to rely on
God. Thank God that He is always reliable and stays the same forever
and always.
No matter what terrible circumstances I may have, I want to keep on
thanking God for His goodness to me. There are so many things yet that
I can always be thankful to God for, no matter what.
I am thankful for great friends. I am thankful that God is always there for me.
I am thankful for the little good things in life.
Lately, I felt that I've disappointed myself and the people around me. Sometimes, others disappoint me too, but yet..
We're not superhuman.
Going to have to pray for a number of things these days.
-
I thank God for E247. Surely they will push N239 to grow to greater heights.
-
Now, I'm faced with many challenges. It is frustrating but I'm trying
to rely more on God to bring me through, especially when many of these
I have not much control over.
I want to keep growing closer to God.
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